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The Importance of Setting Boundaries

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Sharing personal information brings people together, but how do you know if you’re sharing too much? Personal boundaries are rules and limits you set within relationships. They tell you what’s acceptable and what’s not in relationships. The importance of setting personal boundaries allows us to decide what’s acceptable to share with strangers, coworkers and loved ones. Without personal boundaries, we are most likely to be placed in uncomfortable situations or open conflict. There are many types of boundaries. Let’s take a look at some and learn how setting them can affect your life.

Boundary Types:

Rigid BoundariesPorous BoundariesHealthy Boundaries
Avoidant of intimacy and close relationshipsDifficulty saying “no”Doesn’t compromise values for others
Unlikely to ask for helpDependent on the opinions of othersKnows personal wants and needs, and can communicate them
Keeps others at a distance and may deem detachedFears rejection if they do not comply with othersAccepts when others say “no” to them

  • Physical Boundaries– Refer to personal space and physical touch. What is appropriate for you?
  • Intellectual Boundaries– Refer to thoughts and ideas. What are some topics that you would consider to be off limits?
  • Emotional Boundaries– Refer to a person’s feelings. When and what should you share with others?
  • Sexual Boundaries– Refer to emotional, intellectual and physical aspects of sexuality. What is appropriate for you?
  • Material Boundaries– Refer to money and possessions. What are you comfortable sharing and with whom?
  • Time Boundaries– Refers to how a person uses their time.

Food for thought:

Setting boundaries is not simple. We’ve come up with a list of questions to ask yourself.

  • Think about two people in your life. How are they similar? How are they different?
  • What are your most important values? How can your boundaries reflect your values?
  • What are signs of a healthy relationship? What are some boundaries that you think you may see in a healthy relationship?
  • Think about someone who has influenced you. What have they taught you about boundaries?
  • What are some challenges you’ve faced when trying to set healthy boundaries and how have you/could you overcome them?

How we can help:

We offer Life Coaching programs to help individuals gain self-confidence and help make positive changes in their lives. Through treatment modalities, mentoring and experiential therapy, we help clients prepare for their meaningful, independent lives.

We Focus on:

  • Appearance: We help clients learn how to present themselves effectively and look as good as they feel
  • Actions: We help clients learn and adapt new behaviors that positively impact their lives
  • Communication: We teach clients new and effective communication skills
  • Boundaries: We help clients learn how to set boundaries with others
  • Honesty: We help clients with their self-esteem through integrity
  • Giving back: We encourage clients to participate in acts of service

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